Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Babylon A.D. - DVD Review

BABYLON A.D. (*) - Starring Vin Diesel, Michelle Yeoh, Melanie Thierry, Gerard Depardieu, Charlotte Rampling, Lambert Wilson and Mark Strong.
Directed by Matheiu Kassovitz.

I love futuristic movies. Even if done wrong, they can be atrociously entertaining. This movie creates a future that is a cross between The Children of Men, The Fifth Element, and any random 1970's sci-fi TV-movie starring Jack Palance wearing a tin-foil space suit.

What stinks about this one is it's so dull. Vin Diesel has rarely looked less interested in being there on-screen, and even some of his line reads feel like in his head he's saying, "Do you I really have to say this?"

The plot is murky at best. He's some sort of bounty hunter / bodyguard / smuggler type who gets a job of moving a girl from futureRussia to futureAmerica. There's something special about her, and it might be that she carries within her a biological weapon.

Talented folks have signed on for supporting roles, though their first tip-off to this being a disaster was that Vin Diesel got the lead. The director, Mathieu Kassovitz, publicly disowned the movie the week before it opened, and my guess is the script he signed on for wound up being butchered. As bad as The Chronicles of Riddick was, it was still a better movie than this.

And it has one of the lamest last lines of a movie in years.

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