1. KIM KARDASHIAN - The fact that Kim can get paid $17 million to televise her wedding to Kris Humphries only to divorce him 72 days later is wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, and the worst.
2. MAN UP! (ABC) - The six-hundredth sitcom about immature, emasculated guys. It was obnoxious and unnecessary.
3. NICK SWARDSON'S PRETEND TIME (COM) - I tried an episode. It mixes his stand-up with sketches starring him. Neither the sketches nor the stand-up are funny, so I don't see this Sandler coattail-rider lasting much longer.
4. THE PLAYBOY CLUB (NBC) - This series never had a chance (why make a show about the notorious club as a soap opera, a female-centric genre?) but for me it was brought down by Eddie Cibrian's laughable Don Draper impression. It's akin to one of those Syfy movies where they take the same plot as a blockbuster but replace Tom Cruise with C. Thomas Howell.
5. JAMES FRANCO at THE ACADEMY AWARDS (ABC) - They tried to go young, and Anne Hathaway was game, but her co-host froze her out. Franco looked like a guy who regretted saying yes to the gig but couldn't figure out how to get out of it.
6. MEET THE PRESS (NBC) - Tim Russert was king, so that was a big chair to fill, but David Gregory just can't do it. It's the least lively, least informative of the Sunday morning news shows. I watch parts of ABC's This Week, FNC's Fox News Sunday and NBC's Chris Matthews Show almost every week, and sometimes CBS's Face the Nation. Meet the Press? Irrelevant.
7. PERFECT COUPLES (NBC) - Another Friends/Coupling clone, with two semi-charming leads surrounded by two-dimensional duds.
8. HARRY'S LAW (NBC) - Exhibit A that David E. Kelley is going senile. Kathy Bates's performance can only cover so much of the silly plotting and grandstanding lawyer monologues, with some of the least convincing closing arguments ever.
9. I HATE MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER (FOX) - Jaime Pressly deserves better than this vehicle about two neglectful moms who've spoiled their daughters, and now they're reaping the benefits of their daughters being monstrous mean girls.
10. DONALD TRUMP - Not only was his the worst Comedy Central roast ever (thanks, The Situation), but he raised his vulgarity to new heights by teasing a run for the presidency, and trying to moderate his own debate where he'd pick someone to endorse. Stick to Celebrity Apprentice, Don.
FRED ARMISEN as OBAMA - I will bring it up every year until Saturday Night Live rightfully gives the job to Jay Pharaoh.